GIBBONS!!! and 2 Sloths. Awesome and sad zoo and The Tap

So, Wednesday I woke up at my usual fricking 5AM. Christ. I'm on vacation.

Anyway, I just stayed in bed reading for a few hours and got up after Jonny went to work.

I checked the interwebs to see if there was a bank (need to deposit the rent) in the area, an independent coffee shop, and some bread products (Jonny has peanut butter, jam, even hummus but NOT a single cracker or crust of bread in the house...I had a cup of tea and some peanut butter on a spoon for breakfast...actually, that's not that bad of a breakfast).

When I google mapped his place, turns out he is 10 blocks from the Denver Zoo. Cool.

Let's start with the bad:

KIDS. I hate kids and they were everywhere. Busloads of them. Screaming. Don't they have "adults only" hours at the zoo like they do at the pool? And the animals really don't like the screaming. I agree with the animals. Anyway, they sat down to eat at noon so I just kept going.

These animals had enclosures that were too small and showed signs of stress from the caging: bears, rhino, hippo, elephants, giraffes, various "hoofed" animals from africa, eagles and a condor in a cage less than 30 feet high and less than 100 feet long was sad.

Seals didn't look too pleased either.

BUT...some animals seemed to be doing OK. There had been some work on the primate area and most seemed to have enough "enrichment" that they were relaxing rather than pacing or rocking or throwing poo.

Anyway, the gibbons ROCK.

I have a video on my phone but don't know how to put it in the right format.

Then, I'm walking through the bird building which I was going to skip but thought that inside and without kids (they were not that jazzed about the birds). One docent was SUPER chatty which usually annoys me, but this one pointed out sloths that I hadn't noticed! In with birds.

The cave bats and fruit bats were behind glass in another building and I kept ducking when they came to the window. I hate bats.

They had fantastic turtles. The alligator snapping turtle would scare the b-jeezuz out of Pam (Hi Pam), but was very cool.

They have a surprising number of toucans. Who knew?

They have quite a bit of conservation and "anti-extinction" information around which is nice. Several zoo-keepers were available for comment while they worked in the food prep rooms. There were windows in to the rooms and buttong so you could ask them stuff.

I hope they can remedy the cage situations for some of the bigger critters soon.

At the zoo I had no portable cup and eventually gave in and got a lemonade. The plastic cup (DAMMIT) was made of corn. Corn is such a high-petroleum-input crop that I'm not sure it's worth it. I hear that corn plastic decomposes and I did carry the cup (with lemon slice) around for the rest of the visit and kept refilling it at drinking fountains. I did use drinking fountains without a cup for much of the visit, but I was getting woozy from the all protein breakfast and the heat and needed a bit of sugar and flavor to avoid heat stroke (I'm very heat stroky).

Now for a new dilemma. It's easy to get regular skin grease without a plastic bottle. I can refill the ones I have or get shea butter in tins at the Moscow Food Co-op and will look in to ordering larger quantities of shea butter (unrefined) online. BUT: where does one get sun screen without a plastic container? The shea butter has some variable sun screen properties but my nose is already peeling. I didn't even bring a hat or a bandana so the ears may go next. I kept moving the part in my hair to avoid scalp burn. I'm such a moron sometimes.

This was funny. I'm in the primate area and am wearing my black keen shoes with the newly applied retreads, brown carhart pants, a dark green un-marked t-shirt, and the blue removable sleeves shirt I got for christmas a couple of years back. I had the zip-off sleeves zipped off. A kid, about 5 or 6, says "What are you?" I looked confused. He said, "Are you a person who works here" I said "No, but I am an anthropologist". He was not impressed and his mother just walked off. I don't think they realized that that meant I could actually answer a question or two about the mandrills we were looking at.

OH! and this was the best best best. At the main potty room by the entrance/exit gate, they play environmental information in the bathroom (e.g. you help the environment if you shut off the water while you brush your teeth). AND the door of each stall has a picture of an animal head on the outside...and that animal's BUTT on the inside of the door. Awesome. I was in the mandrill stall.

I made some pasta for dinner for Jonny and me and then we went to see Michael McKean, Christopher Guest, and Harry Shearer at the Paramount Theatre here in Denver. AWESOME!!

They were hysterical and Christopher Guest is a seriously good musician. They did all their big songs and a few more that we hadn't heard much or at all before. Big Bottom was redone as a jazz bit with only Shearer on bass and McKean and Guest snapping their fingers and reciting/singing the song. A woman in a black leotard came out and did a free form jazz dance to the song. Disappointingly, she was very thin and did NOT have a big bottom. I would have much preferred a Beth Ditto type in the role. Oh well.

I did have to run out and pee during Stone Henge (no dwarves or props) and used that time to get a t-shirt.

We were in the 7th row on the aisle and could see very well. It was fabulous. Money well spent. we're going to wear the t-shirts to the clown museum on Saturday.

Today (it's actually Thursday because I was too tired last night to get it together and finish the blog) we're heading out to Twin Lakes Reservoir and the Mines and Ores or Ores and Mines B&B. Should be fab as well. Friday is the alligator farm and Walsenburg and Saturday is the clown museum and back here. Sunday the green festival is in town and I'm hoping to go to a bit of that.

VACATION!!!! DAY 1

Today I flew to Denver to visit Jonny (hi jonny). I got in at about 2pm and Jonny picked me up at 2:30. He had been at class and needed to get back to work.

Here he is working:












I'm sitting at a lovely desk tha thas a panoramic view of the mountains and free wifi. Jonny provided his laptop with a "guest" user and password just for me. He's so sweet. On the way he stopped at the Super Target so I could get some food. I had a lovely wrap that turned out to have some roquefort in it. Oops. I don't think it was much since it was the 3rd to the last ingredient, after "vinegar" and "salt". I have the neti pot so don't think I'll end up with any dairy-sinus issues.

Anyway, I hear there is a whole foods on the way home which is good as I need some seasalt and apple cider vinegar. I just couldn' t face explaining 2 white powders (sea salt and baking soda) and some vinegar to the security at the airport so will buy it here. I haven't washed my hair in a week. I thought about it this morning but it always gets gross while flying anyway so why bother. I've got all day tomorrow relaxing at Jonny's swinging pad (I accidentally typed "swining" pad which would be totally different) before the big show.

Someone has already posted segments of the Unwigged tour.
Here's a taste:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MsU0cGZpurA
(it won't embed...son of a BITCH)

Anyway, hope they don't mind my carharts and a sweater because that is what I brought. I packed for 6 days in a small day pack. It's usually my field pack.

To try to comply with the "no more plastic bottles thing" I decided to bring a enamel ware cup rather than the steel bottle. The bottle would look incriminating on the x-ray. And I didn't want them taking it because it's 20$ or so. So, I went with the cup. Of course I was tempted by the Starbucks in the airport (I don't usually indulge in that, prefer local businesses) and got an iced soy chai which they put in a plastic cup! Dammit. Oh well. I'm using the enamel cup now at Jonny's office.

Maybe I'll get a hip metal bottle here and give it to Jonny as part of his hostess gift.

Speaking of that...I was reading his hostess gift on the plane and realized that it probably didn't look good. I had picked up a copy of "Male Sexuality" (a self-help book from the 1970s) at a thrift store and added that to the copy of "Everything you ever wanted to know about sex but were afraid to ask" that I had already gotten (same thrift store...theme?). Well, reading that on the plane was probably not making me look classy. I didn't want to stand up and explain to everyone who had walked down aisle and seen me giggling over pages with LARGE PRINT headers suggesting I take stock of my sex life or perhaps write a letter to myself from my ...um... "male appendage"; that I was reading this book IRONICALLY. I figured that would just make it worse. I didn't feel like reading the magazine that was in the seat pocket and had been handled by god knows who. That normally doesn't bother me but I really don't want to get sick at the start of a vacation.

Anyway, here I sit in a lovely ec0-appropriate office drinking my water out of a cup I brought from home..woohoo!


Jonny tells me that the urinals are waterless but I haven't been able to confirm that. I think I'll make a run to the ladies and come report on that....

OK, I couldn’t find the women’s room and the free wifi just died so now I’m typing into a word document and lost the photo and this never works. Oh well. I can always retype it later. It’s not like I have much to do.

Jonny showed me the way to the women's room.

The women’s room is lovely! Big, roomy, plenty of turlets. AND they are dual flush with a green-colored handle, which according to the signage on the wall is an antibacterial coating. It was “up for liquid waste” and “down for solid waste”. This left me with many questions. What if you can’t quite decide if that was liquid or solid? Anyway, I’ll leave it there, shall I?


But first, some photos:


Full view of turlet area with green "anti-bacterial handle"















And here is a close-up of the instructions (I took all photos BEFORE using the turlet).














The internet is still down but Jonny has real work to do so I’m trying not to bother him. I do have the iPod that Pam sends preloaded so I can always listen to that. So hard not to bother Jonny while he works…must not do it. Hmmm…what to do. I suppose I could try to break into other parts of his computer. I don’t know how to do that. I can dig a square hole but I can’t “hack” into a computer.

Time to iPod…ah….Pilkington. The thing is acting up a bit. Must need re-whatevered.

(posted later from Jonny's place while he makes me steam-sauteed broccoli with basmati rice pilaf and tequila lime salmon burgers...mmmm)

I'm Baaaaaack...

Well, for a day or two anyway.
I'm having trouble with internet access and getting the blog up. I was trying to write it in notepad and then quickly post it at work, but this isn't working because the line wrap thingy gets all wonky and that drives me NUTS.

Anyway, right now I'm at a conference at the Wildhorse Casino outside Pendleton, Oregon. It's a lovely facility and pretty cheap.

And, it comes with a side of cheesy so that makes it even better. Here is the view from my window:













Honestly, it's not worse than the view if you could see the landscape. The word "desolate" comes to mind. This is the area of the world scoured by the Missoula Floods (back an ice age or so ago, western Montana and into Canada was a big lake held in place by some an ice dam near the Montana/Idaho border...sometimes the dam would break and the HUGE wall of water...like 1500feet deep...would wash over North Idaho and parts of Washington and Oregon taking all the dirt with it. This happened multiple times) and also an area that has been to dry to grow many plants and thusly little soil formation and thusly...bit of a moonscape.

And here is my favorite part of the room...the Door to Nowhere:













It's in a sidewall and goes to a thin little space and another door. I wanted to take pictures of that and will try again tomorrow. Right now the neighbors on the other side of the other door to nowhere are in and I don't want to freak them out any more than necessary.
The back side of the door has no knob but there is no deadbolt or any other locking device. Not even a locking door knob! And the latch is one of the kind that is so easy to open with a credit card or that plastic room key thingy.

The door also appears to be hollow core as does its mate. We were served a lovely buffet that was...oh, let's say "heavy". We were all making grand efforts not to break windage during the post dinner discussion, There was much fidgeting. Many fake cell phone calls were taken as an excuse to go into the hallway and make a dash for the restroom. Here's hoping the neighbors' stomachs were not too upset by the dinner.

In OTHER NEWS....I'm totally going to see SPINAL TAP in concert!
OK, it's the main three guys from Spinal Tap and not in costume and they will be playing acoustically, but STILL!! Awesome. I'm going to the concert in Denver and my friend Jonny (Hi Jonny) is going with me. We will have a freaking BALL. I'm totally going to make t-shirts.

OK, I need to do a bit of yoga before I get stuck in a crap TV loop...too late. I'm watching some sort of tranny model contest run by RuPaul. It appears to be called "RuPaul's Drag Race". OH MY GOD! Charo is going to be on. I'm totally stuck in a crap TV loop already. Oh well.